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<title><![CDATA[SRL Lifestyles Family Columnists Bill Mitcham]]></title>
<link>http://www2.statesville.com/content/list/lifestyles/family/columnists/mitcham/</link>
<description><![CDATA[SRL Lifestyles Family Columnists Bill Mitcham]]></description>
<language>en</language>

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<title><![CDATA[Sometimes, being bored can be a good thing]]></title>

<link><![CDATA[http://www2.statesville.com/content/2009/jan/08/sometimes-being-bored-can-be-good-thing/lifestyles-relationships_special_occasions-parenting/]]></link>


<guid><![CDATA[http://www2.statesville.com/content/2009/jan/08/sometimes-being-bored-can-be-good-thing/lifestyles-relationships_special_occasions-parenting/]]></guid>

<description><![CDATA[Men, in general, would rather go to the dentist than go shopping with their wife. The reason this is true is related to the difference in philosophies about shopping between the genders. To men, shopping is pure and simple. You need shoes; you go buy a pair — just like the ones you are now wearing, same color. The only reason men go shopping is because the old shoes are falling apart.]]></description>
<pubDate><![CDATA[Thu, 08 Jan 2009 06:00:00 EST]]></pubDate>
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<title><![CDATA[Your expression can speak volumes]]></title>

<link><![CDATA[http://www2.statesville.com/content/2009/jan/02/your-expression-can-speak-volumes/lifestyles-relationships_special_occasions-parenting/]]></link>


<guid><![CDATA[http://www2.statesville.com/content/2009/jan/02/your-expression-can-speak-volumes/lifestyles-relationships_special_occasions-parenting/]]></guid>

<description><![CDATA[One of the great human dilemmas is the reality that others can see us better than we can see ourselves. This makes being married a real challenge. Husbands can see things wives can't see. Wives can see things husbands can't see. ]]></description>
<pubDate><![CDATA[Fri, 02 Jan 2009 06:00:00 EST]]></pubDate>
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<title><![CDATA[Seven symptoms of depression]]></title>

<link><![CDATA[http://www2.statesville.com/content/2008/dec/18/seven-symptoms-depression/lifestyles-relationships_special_occasions-parenting/]]></link>


<guid><![CDATA[http://www2.statesville.com/content/2008/dec/18/seven-symptoms-depression/lifestyles-relationships_special_occasions-parenting/]]></guid>

<description><![CDATA[Last week's article focused on the effect of depression on a marriage relationship. Today, we will cover the symptoms of depression and how they play out in a marriage. ]]></description>
<pubDate><![CDATA[Thu, 18 Dec 2008 06:00:00 EST]]></pubDate>
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<title><![CDATA[Depression can have major impact on marriage]]></title>

<link><![CDATA[http://www2.statesville.com/content/2008/dec/12/depression-can-have-major-impact-marriage/lifestyles-relationships_special_occasions-parenting/]]></link>


<guid><![CDATA[http://www2.statesville.com/content/2008/dec/12/depression-can-have-major-impact-marriage/lifestyles-relationships_special_occasions-parenting/]]></guid>

<description><![CDATA[Nothing plays havoc with a marriage relationship like the depression of one spouse. It can be a gradual impact or it can be a sudden broadside of a marriage that was fun and fulfilling for both partners. ]]></description>
<pubDate><![CDATA[Fri, 12 Dec 2008 15:59:00 EST]]></pubDate>
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<title><![CDATA[Conflicts can be 'head vs. heart']]></title>

<link><![CDATA[http://www2.statesville.com/content/2008/nov/27/conflicts-can-be-head-vs-heart/lifestyles-relationships_special_occasions-parenting/]]></link>


<guid><![CDATA[http://www2.statesville.com/content/2008/nov/27/conflicts-can-be-head-vs-heart/lifestyles-relationships_special_occasions-parenting/]]></guid>

<description><![CDATA[Do you sometimes think your spouse is overly sensitive, wears their feelings on their sleeve, avoids conflict and is overly accommodating? If so, there is a good chance you are married to a spouse who is a Feeling Type Personality Partner (FTPP). ]]></description>
<pubDate><![CDATA[Thu, 27 Nov 2008 06:00:00 EST]]></pubDate>
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<title><![CDATA[How different types of personalities react]]></title>

<link><![CDATA[http://www2.statesville.com/content/2008/nov/06/how-different-types-personalities-react/lifestyles-relationships_special_occasions-parenting/]]></link>


<guid><![CDATA[http://www2.statesville.com/content/2008/nov/06/how-different-types-personalities-react/lifestyles-relationships_special_occasions-parenting/]]></guid>

<description><![CDATA[Carl Jung, the famous Swiss psychiatrist, studied human interaction for most of his life. He developed a series of personality profiles for how individuals function in the world. He boiled human behavior down to two basic questions, "What is going on?" and "How do I respond to what is going on?" One is intake and the other is output. ]]></description>
<pubDate><![CDATA[Thu, 06 Nov 2008 06:00:00 EST]]></pubDate>
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<title><![CDATA[When divorce isn't the answer]]></title>

<link><![CDATA[http://www2.statesville.com/content/2008/oct/16/when-divorce-isnt-answer/lifestyles-relationships_special_occasions-parenting/]]></link>


<guid><![CDATA[http://www2.statesville.com/content/2008/oct/16/when-divorce-isnt-answer/lifestyles-relationships_special_occasions-parenting/]]></guid>

<description><![CDATA[I once saw a teaching video at a conference on problem-solving. Not a word was spoken in the brief movie. It showed a fireboat full of fire fighters. They stopped at a boat, hooked up the fire hoses and began to hose down the boat they assumed to be on fire. ]]></description>
<pubDate><![CDATA[Thu, 16 Oct 2008 06:00:00 EDT]]></pubDate>
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<title><![CDATA[Facing your fears in marriage]]></title>

<link><![CDATA[http://www2.statesville.com/content/2008/oct/09/facing-your-fears-marriage/lifestyles-relationships_special_occasions-parenting/]]></link>


<guid><![CDATA[http://www2.statesville.com/content/2008/oct/09/facing-your-fears-marriage/lifestyles-relationships_special_occasions-parenting/]]></guid>

<description><![CDATA[I recently heard a speaker state "A man's biggest fear is to be controlled and a woman's biggest fear is to be used." In reflecting on this, I began to wonder if this is true and, if it is, how this truism plays itself out in a marriage.]]></description>
<pubDate><![CDATA[Thu, 09 Oct 2008 06:00:00 EDT]]></pubDate>
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<title><![CDATA[Gender differences can lead to frustration]]></title>

<link><![CDATA[http://www2.statesville.com/content/2008/oct/02/gender-differences-can-lead-frustration/lifestyles-relationships_special_occasions-parenting/]]></link>


<guid><![CDATA[http://www2.statesville.com/content/2008/oct/02/gender-differences-can-lead-frustration/lifestyles-relationships_special_occasions-parenting/]]></guid>

<description><![CDATA[In Part One of this article, we examined some research on the different brain structures of the two genders. These differences often cause conflicts between spouses since women can multitask and men have difficulty focusing on more than one thing at a time.]]></description>
<pubDate><![CDATA[Thu, 02 Oct 2008 06:00:00 EDT]]></pubDate>
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<title><![CDATA[The difference between men's and women's brains]]></title>

<link><![CDATA[http://www2.statesville.com/content/2008/sep/25/different-between-mens-and-womens-brains/lifestyles-relationships_special_occasions-parenting/]]></link>


<guid><![CDATA[http://www2.statesville.com/content/2008/sep/25/different-between-mens-and-womens-brains/lifestyles-relationships_special_occasions-parenting/]]></guid>

<description><![CDATA[Researchers think they have found in their studies of male and female brain structure — the answer to the complaint by many women that men "sometimes don't get it." Very few, if any, men haven't heard this statement from their wife. Also, many wives complain about husbands not listening or being so engrossed in television or the computer  that it is like talking to a telephone pole — there is absolutely no response. ]]></description>
<pubDate><![CDATA[Thu, 25 Sep 2008 06:00:00 EDT]]></pubDate>
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<title><![CDATA[Four factors shown to erode marital well-being]]></title>

<link><![CDATA[http://www2.statesville.com/content/2008/sep/18/four-factors-shown-erode-marital-well-being/lifestyles-relationships_special_occasions-parenting/]]></link>


<guid><![CDATA[http://www2.statesville.com/content/2008/sep/18/four-factors-shown-erode-marital-well-being/lifestyles-relationships_special_occasions-parenting/]]></guid>

<description><![CDATA[In an earlier column, I wrote about some significant research on marital success that identified positive couple interchanges as one of the major things that holds couples together. Negative couple interchanges are the scissors that slowly cut into the bondedness of a couple.]]></description>
<pubDate><![CDATA[Thu, 18 Sep 2008 06:00:00 EDT]]></pubDate>
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<title><![CDATA[Which type of love relationship do you have?]]></title>

<link><![CDATA[http://www2.statesville.com/content/2008/sep/11/which-type-love-relationship-do-you-have/lifestyles-relationships_special_occasions-parenting/]]></link>


<guid><![CDATA[http://www2.statesville.com/content/2008/sep/11/which-type-love-relationship-do-you-have/lifestyles-relationships_special_occasions-parenting/]]></guid>

<description><![CDATA[Virginia Satir, one of the great Master Marriage and Family Therapists, discovered six types of love relationships in her many years of working with couples. She gave all six of them names.]]></description>
<pubDate><![CDATA[Thu, 11 Sep 2008 06:00:00 EDT]]></pubDate>
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<title><![CDATA[A marriage needs more than luck to last]]></title>

<link><![CDATA[http://www2.statesville.com/content/2008/sep/04/marriage-needs-more-luck-last/lifestyles-relationships_special_occasions-parenting/]]></link>


<guid><![CDATA[http://www2.statesville.com/content/2008/sep/04/marriage-needs-more-luck-last/lifestyles-relationships_special_occasions-parenting/]]></guid>

<description><![CDATA[My wife, Jane, and I just returned from a three-week River Cruise to Europe. We started in Budapest, Hungary and cruised on the Danube and Rhine rivers through Austria, Germany and The Netherlands, ending in Amsterdam. ]]></description>
<pubDate><![CDATA[Thu, 04 Sep 2008 08:40:00 EDT]]></pubDate>
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<title><![CDATA[Birth order can play a role in married life]]></title>

<link><![CDATA[http://www2.statesville.com/content/2008/aug/07/birth-order-can-play-role-married-life/lifestyles-relationships_special_occasions-parenting/]]></link>


<guid><![CDATA[http://www2.statesville.com/content/2008/aug/07/birth-order-can-play-role-married-life/lifestyles-relationships_special_occasions-parenting/]]></guid>

<description><![CDATA[One of the major influences on a successful marriage is one's birth order.  Were you the first born, the last child or a middle child? ]]></description>
<pubDate><![CDATA[Thu, 07 Aug 2008 15:40:00 EDT]]></pubDate>
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<title><![CDATA[Change and growth are part of every marriage]]></title>

<link><![CDATA[http://www2.statesville.com/content/2008/jul/31/change-and-growth-are-part-every-marriage/lifestyles-relationships_special_occasions-parenting/]]></link>


<guid><![CDATA[http://www2.statesville.com/content/2008/jul/31/change-and-growth-are-part-every-marriage/lifestyles-relationships_special_occasions-parenting/]]></guid>

<description><![CDATA[Sadly, most people don't know marriage is not just about love and attraction for another person. It is really about the continued transformation of the self. ]]></description>
<pubDate><![CDATA[Thu, 31 Jul 2008 18:37:00 EDT]]></pubDate>
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<title><![CDATA[The critical needs that make a marriage work]]></title>

<link><![CDATA[http://www2.statesville.com/content/2008/jul/10/critical-needs-make-marriage-work/lifestyles-relationships_special_occasions-parenting/]]></link>


<guid><![CDATA[http://www2.statesville.com/content/2008/jul/10/critical-needs-make-marriage-work/lifestyles-relationships_special_occasions-parenting/]]></guid>

<description><![CDATA[Through the years as a Marriage and Family Therapist, I have discovered 12 critical needs that have to be met for a marriage relationship to work. ]]></description>
<pubDate><![CDATA[Thu, 10 Jul 2008 14:11:00 EDT]]></pubDate>
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<title><![CDATA[A sexual 'checkmate']]></title>

<link><![CDATA[http://www2.statesville.com/content/2008/jun/26/sexual-checkmate/lifestyles-relationships_special_occasions-parenting/]]></link>


<guid><![CDATA[http://www2.statesville.com/content/2008/jun/26/sexual-checkmate/lifestyles-relationships_special_occasions-parenting/]]></guid>

<description><![CDATA["Checkmate" is the word used in the game of chess when the game is over. It is a dead end — no place to go. There are no other moves.]]></description>
<pubDate><![CDATA[Thu, 26 Jun 2008 14:12:00 EDT]]></pubDate>
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<title><![CDATA[Emotional intelligence plays a role in marriage]]></title>

<link><![CDATA[http://www2.statesville.com/content/2008/jun/19/emotional-intelligence-plays-role-marriage/lifestyles-relationships_special_occasions-parenting/]]></link>


<guid><![CDATA[http://www2.statesville.com/content/2008/jun/19/emotional-intelligence-plays-role-marriage/lifestyles-relationships_special_occasions-parenting/]]></guid>

<description><![CDATA[Daniel Goleman, in his bestseller "Emotional Intelligence," gave wings to the idea that human beings have two minds, one that thinks and one that feels. These two different ways of "knowing" are meant to work together as a team. ]]></description>
<pubDate><![CDATA[Thu, 19 Jun 2008 14:17:00 EDT]]></pubDate>
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<title><![CDATA[Emotional poison can ruin a marriage]]></title>

<link><![CDATA[http://www2.statesville.com/content/2008/may/29/emotional-poison-can-ruin-marriage/lifestyles-relationships_special_occasions-parenting/]]></link>


<guid><![CDATA[http://www2.statesville.com/content/2008/may/29/emotional-poison-can-ruin-marriage/lifestyles-relationships_special_occasions-parenting/]]></guid>

<description><![CDATA[All of us know family members or friends who have divorced.]]></description>
<pubDate><![CDATA[Thu, 29 May 2008 14:21:00 EDT]]></pubDate>
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