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Mom no match for preschoolers
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Published: September 18, 2008
My youngest son, Ben, walked into my room the other day, proudly waving the leg to our yellow sofa table over his head.
Somehow, amazingly, he'd found the leg to the table just lying in the middle of our den floor.
Yeah, right.
Since the last time I'd looked, the leg had been firmly attached to the table, I decided to investigate.
After assuring me he had not a clue as to how this could have happened, I asked the only other person in the house, his 4-year-old best friend, if she knew how it had gotten broken.
No, she hadn't the slightest idea, she told me, her big eyes widening with a look of total sincerity.
OK, I thought, she gets points for perfecting the Bambi routine, but clearly someone is lying here. I sat them side by side, and used my sternest "grown-up" voice. Whoever told the truth wouldn't get consequences, I promised.
But my tactics were no match for a duo of scheming preschoolers.
They looked at each other and had the audacity to share a little grin.
Then they looked back at me, mirroring expressions of innocence, and said in unison "I don't know what happened. I didn't do it."
And they stuck to their stories. No pointing fingers and blaming the other one. No wild stories about how men from outer space landed in our den, accidentally knocking out the table leg on their way down.
Just two slightly smug kids basking in the knowledge that — this time — those eyes in the back of mom's head must have been shut.
So now I'm left to wonder how it happened and how I managed to get so easily out-maneuvered by two kids who can't even put on their own shoes.
I'm a quick learner, though. The next time they try to pull a fast one, I'm going to give them a slightly smug smile and punish them both.
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