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Give yourself many doses of quiet time
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Published: August 22, 2008
A good friend and his wife just celebrated their 35th wedding anniversary, so I asked him the secret to their marital success.
"It's very simple," my friend smiled. "Our marriage is a partnership, and I'm the silent partner."
Yes, he was being funny, but it made me realize how silence-starved and silence-averse we are in America. Do you know someone who keeps the television on in their house for noise?
It's like we fear going deep within our minds in thought, which silence and quiet time affords, so we distract ourselves with Judge Judy or Dr. Phil.
Too Much Information
In "Sshh: Men at Work," Maclean's Kate Lunau writes about a unique project at Intel, where each Tuesday from 8:30 a.m. until 12 p.m. at two U.S. locations, about 300 engineers and managers turn off their phones and computers to indulge in "Quiet Time," a time to think, reflect and create.
Research by Gloria Mark and Victor Gonzales of the University of California Irvine found that "today's knowledge workers can expect just three minutes of uninterrupted work on any given task."
Dr. Mark says "To be able to think very deeply, you must have quiet time." Peter Drucker weighs in by advising you to "Follow effective action with quiet reflection. From the quiet reflection will come even more effective action."
No-Vacation Nation
That's the title of a July 2007 www.Kiplinger.com story that finds the "U.S. is the only advanced economy in the world that does not guarantee its workers paid vacation." Most of Europe mandates at least 20 days, in addition to holidays.
We work too much and relax too little, so it's up to you to carve time out of each day to bring balance to your life, to allow time to think, plan and assess.
What can you do? Here are some ideas:
- Take a walk at lunch: Statesville's many parks, and sidewalks afford you a healthy way to break up the day and gain new perspective. Remember, a rut is a grave with the ends knocked out. Shake up your routine and your mind.
- Spend some alone time: Companionship is great, but occasionally go somewhere for the day, by yourself, to shop or people-watch. For a change, turn off the radio in the car and savor the gift of quiet time.
- Make "Me-Time" daily: Set aside "you" time, and cancel only when you must. Anything from a bubble bath late at night, a half hour each day in the office with your door closed, a regular exercise routine, anything, but just do it.
- Watch TV selectively — Identify those shows you want to see, watch them, then turn it off. Channel surfing nightly for hours is a sad way to exist.
Take Time to Think
A man, fighting his neighbor over a land dispute, hired a lawyer to defend his property.
After the trial's second day, the man told his lawyer they needed an extra attorney for their case.
When the lawyer asked why, the man replied, "It's like this. My neighbor has two lawyers, and when one's up there talkin', the other one's sittin' there thinking."
"But when you're up there talking, ain't nobody thinking!"
Embrace moments of silence and quiet time. It's the magic balm for stressed minds.
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